Going to America!

Post by Lara and Kevin

You may have heard by now that we're about to take a short trip back to the states for a wedding.  Well, we decided to write this post to prepare our friends and family for some odd behavior we might exhibit during our little trip.  Below are some pointers.

• We will probably frequently forget that running water is potable, and may get very excited upon remembering this.
• If we see you while we're back, we're likely to try and shake your hand...just go with it.
• We may not want to eat rice, since rice makes up about 90% of the calories we've taken in since arriving in Africa...but we'll need to eat rice, since rice makes up about 90% of the calories we've taken in since arriving in Africa.
• We may not remember that proper etiquette in the US dictates that you flush the toilet after every use.  If so, and you're the next one into the bathroom, sorry ya!
• We are incredibly likely to insert a plethora of "ya"s, "oh"s, and "mm"s into daily conversation.  Hope that's not too confusing.
• Going on with the proper etiquette, we may or may not just sweep food that has fallen off the plate onto the floor in hopes that some animal will eventually eat it.  We're really going to try on this one...
• If we see bananas or oranges [or most any tropical fruits], we'll probably get really confused/dismayed about the fact that the bananas are yellow and the oranges are orange. Everything is picked green here (and still more delicious than the yellowest American banana you've ever eaten-- mark my words!).
• If you are unfortunate enough to accompany us to a restaurant, we sincerely hope you have half a day to waste and the patience of Job. We're used to places that are offering two to three options at a time, and still won't bring your meal for an hour plus.  US restaurant menus might bring on panic attacks.
• Under no circumstances should anyone allow us to drink more than 2 alcoholic beverages in a sitting.  Seriously-- we are lightweights in the extreme. That being said, Kevin will do a happy dance any time anyone offers him even a sip of beer that's not Carlsberg, Heineken, "strong stout," or Star.
• We're probably going to feel cold no matter what the temperature is, since September in Ohio and Kentucky is pretty much always chillier than "the surface of the sun," and that's what we're used to.
• Lara is fairly sure that if there's a bowl full of apples at the hotel, she will try to eat them all.  Be forewarned.
• If we randomly start smiling or laughing like crazy people, it's probably a reaction to seeing or remembering something we haven't been around in over a year, such as the cereal aisle at a grocery store or cars following the laws of traffic or sidewalks that aren't strewn with litter.  Give us a minute and we'll try to pull it together.